Anthony Caffrey
Phuck You
Posts : 165
Join date : 2015-11-23
Age : 105
Wrestler Name(s) : Anthony Caffrey
 | Subject: Anthony Caffrey on The Road Home, 6/11/16 (Redemption Picks)  Mon Jun 13, 2016 3:34 am | |
| I'm going to color myself later, I have things to do.
The following is a transcript of Anthony Caffrey’s 6/11/16 appearance on 94.5, the Phanatic, a Philadelphia sports radio network.
Pat “Wheels” Wheeler: Ladies and gentlemen, you’re listening to The Road Home on 94.5 the Phanatic, thanks for staying with us on your drive home this fine Saturday night. Up next we’ve got a special treat for all of you, coming from the wrestling world.
Stanley “The Fish” Gill: That’s right. Now as some of you may know, next Sunday Brutal Force Wrestling is holding its Redemption pay-per-view from the Dunkin Donuts Center, only on the Frix Network. We have a special guest, and in my opinion, the best professional wrestler out there from Philadelphia, Anthony Caffrey, who will team up with Tokyo Zombie to fight Akwath and Sinister Minister. Anthony Caffrey, glad you could join us tonight.
Caffrey: Thank you, Fish, and thanks Wheels, for having me. I’d correct you right out the gate and say that his name is ‘Akragth’, but he’s generally awful anyway, so I don’t really care.
Wheeler: Generally awful? Those are some words right there.
Caffrey: Yeah, they’re words. I use words -- us wrestlers are not just braindead meatsacks, some of us are actually intelligent, some, not all -- before I get in the ring with an opponent to take them down mentally before I have to take them apart physically.
Gill: Before we get into your match this coming Sunday, not tomorrow but next week, we’d like to talk to you about the rest of the card, and try to get an insider’s knowledge of the event.
Caffrey: You say that like I know what’s going to happen, Stanley. I only know that I’m going to go kick...your guy is waving at me frantically telling me reminding me I can’t curse here, but you get the idea. What’s the first match again?
Wheeler: It says here The House of Serena vs. Kitty Rose and the Davis Brothers. The smile on your face immediately came off. Are you alright?
Caffrey: You’re asking me to pick between three bozos and people who think baby fetuses have a spot in wrestling. This is my livelihood, my passion, my career, and those morons wanna bring stuff like that into BFW and the wrestling world. Do you know how hard it is to tell people what I do when they watch the show and then I have to explain to them that we’ve got like THAT running around? I spent years of my life breaking many bones, blood has poured out of my body, but you know what gets the attention? Baby fetuses. I vote Team Baby Fetus, which is the House of Serena.
Gill: I never thought The Road Home would feature the word fetus so much (laughs).
Wheeler: Is that really a thing?
Caffrey: Go look it up.
Wheeler: Would I want to?
Caffrey: No.
Wheeler: Anywwaaaaay uh, the next match here is a six way ladder match, between...geez, these names.
Caffrey: Give it a try.
Wheeler: Flash, Guyashi, Scarlett, Adam Gatner, O-Solo, and Ryan Keys. It says here it’s for the Phoenix Championship too. What is that?
Caffrey: BFW is putting a spotlight on the people lower on the card, giving them an opportunity to...advance their careers by winning that championship. If they then defend it three times in a row, and it has to be defended everytime they’re in the building for a show, they get a Carnage Championship Match, even though absolutely none of them deserve one because half the people in that match are either too green for me to care or have been around this company so many months that they’ve proven themselves to be like Peter Bourjos.
Gill: Peter Bourjos?
Caffrey: The fact that you couldn’t even remember who Peter Bourjos is is exactly my point. I’ll pick Scarlett, though Scarlett gets thrown too many opportunities for someone who just continually shows no improvement. I think Adler has a crush on her.
Gill: Adler?
Caffrey: The owner, Adler, who called me before this interview and let me know he would fine me if I badmouthed him. He looks a lot like the cowbell guy. We’ll see if that gets me fined.
Wheeler: What world do you live in where you can openly badmouth your boss?
Caffrey: Oh, I’m sure he’ll add some ridiculous stipulation to my match, just like the Saints and Sinners angle we’ll talk about later. I just don’t care about Adler. It’s his company, I get checks, he knows I’m too good.
Gill: The next match is Apollo Nighthawk vs. Anton Chase vs. Lily.
Caffrey: Who?
Fish: That’s the names.
Caffrey: I don’t know who any of those people are.
Wheeler: How do you not know who people are in your own company?
Caffrey: Alright Wheels, let’s get something straight here. I’m up here. Fairly close to the top of the mountain, funny enough I’ve been banned from it for a while, probably until at least the end of 2016. I’m a star. I’m a face they put on billboards. I was on I-95 earlier to get back into Philadelphia for this interview and my face was on one. My regimen does not allow me to deal with, or even seriously think about, the people who are below me talent-wise. We all hate the Patriots and they suck but it’s like if the Patriots with Tom Brady played the Browns. You can’t tell me the Patriots are seriously scouting the Browns. I’m busy dealing with champions, Amis Shelton, Jack Colter, Tokyo, et cetera. I don’t have the time to sit around and watch some guy named Apollo Nighthawk’s material, even right now I’m focusing on three other guys. If he wants to cry about it he can, but when he or any of the others in this match actually becomes anything near of a threat to me, I’ll bingewatch his stuff and catch up and be way ready to strike them back down. I’ve put eight years in this industry, I’m not about to let Joe Schmore off the street knock me off my pedestal. They’ve got work to do before I even look their way, though.
Wheeler: Okay. Fish, what’s the next match?
Gill: Uh uh it’s Grant & Roscar vs. The Hero and Rey Del Oro.
Caffrey: Easily Grant and Roscar.
Gill: From what I understand, aren’t they hated?
Caffrey: They’re just two guys trying to make a name for themselves in this industry. If you have to destroy some people and the audience doesn’t like it, it’s too tough for them. This is not a business where we can afford to get cute. Cute breaks bones, costs money, months of careers. I have the admiration of most of the audience and I respect that but you put me in the ring with Cartwright, with Tokyo, with anybody popular, you treat it the same. I can’t condone violence outside the ring but I see two hungry guys who could be challenging for my tag championship when it’s all over.
Wheeler: You seem a little bit irritated, Caffrey.
Caffrey: Eight years in the industry will do that to ya.
Gill: Have you thought about retiring?
Caffrey: And do what, exactly?
Wheeler: Fair enough. The next match is Summer vs. Kara Arwen.
Caffrey: Yeah.
Wheeler: That’s not any bit of an expert analysis.
Caffrey: I honestly have no idea what this company is doing with the women. On one hand, some of them I’ve seen are tough, could maybe take me, and then on the other hand, on PPV I’m supposed to get excited for two ladies I’ve never heard of before wrestling. Meh.
Wheeler: Do you just not watch the show?
Caffrey: No, I do, I take notes on everybody. Whether I go back and look at notes on some people is debatable. This is Redemption, though. I plan on wrestling my heart out next week. This is pay-per-view. People hand over their money for this. It’s not free like other shows. You don’t just put out any match on this show. You could flip a coin and decide for me -- go ahead and get one out, Fish. I just don’t think I’m going to be impressed with either of them. Maybe they will prove me wrong.
Gill: It was tails.
Caffrey: Arwen.
Wheeler: Let’s take a break from the match card for just a minute and get to know you a little better. Your finisher is called the CAL, which stands for Caffrey’s Ankle Lock. How did that come into being?
Caffrey: A better wrestler who stole it off another wrestler I used to roll with broke my ankle with it. I’m not a fan of flashy lift ‘em up finishers. The thrill of watching someone squirm in pain and submit is way better than the sound of the thud of face hitting mat. I stole it from the better wrestler, used it to win a...handful of championships now, and my version is considered one of the best in the country.
Gill: If you could wrestle any of your rivals throughout your career just one more time, who would it be?
Caffrey: Oh. Ooh. Good question. Powerbomb McGee. He retired and cost me the Phighter name and thousands of dollars in that process. Ooh, Dexter Point too, crafty, crafty SOB. Colby Cash, I miss messing with him and I think about it all the time. I never got to wrestle Father Lance Goodison so maybe him, too, but we weren’t really rivals, I just wanted the honor of doing it. Yogi’s Assassin and Faith Dunkarino were two of the best women I’ve ever wrestled, so maybe them. Just one more time? I don’t know. One of them. Oh, Travis Matthews, too. Always wanted to punch him in the face. Always.
Gill: I’m noticing a lack of Tommy Stone on that list.
Caffrey: Yeah.
Gill: Why not Tommy? For eight years, you two have been back and forth…
Caffrey: For eight years I’ve been better than Tommy Stone. Eight years. You know what was eight years ago? The Phillies winning the World Series. That’s how long it’s been, Fish.
Gill: I heard there was talks of you having a match with him after Redemption. You were even pushing them. What happened?
Caffrey: He’s just generally irritating guy, and I wanted to put him in his place because he’s just been getting on my nerves lately, but I woke up last week and realized he’s about to be put in his place by Adam Wolfe anyway. He should not be challenging for the Carnage Championship, I don’t know whose back he scratched to get himself another shot after coming up short like that but if there’s one match he shouldn’t be in, it’s that. He should be in the Phoenix Championship match full of people like him.
Wheeler: Are you saying this out of a place of hatred, or…?
Caffrey: Wheels, I can’t remember how many years ago it was, but at some point I turned on him when we teamed years ago and powerbombed him on a sledgehammer. I can’t remember if he still has the scar. That powerbomb was our barbershop. I went on to being a world caliber wrestler, a World Champion, winning championship after championship after championship. Do you ever think Tommy Stone’s been ranked by prestigious wrestling mags? I haven’t seen it yet if he has. I have nothing to prove against the guy. He’s extremely jealous of my career, and if I was in his situation, I would be too. There’s nothing to be jealous of Tommy Stone about. Wheels, do you like coffee mugs?
Wheeler: They’re alright I guess?
Caffrey: I can’t remember if this is true or not but I heard a rumor that his fans send him coffee mugs from all over the place. If you’d like to be jealous of that, you can be, but otherwise, there’s nothing. I imagine most of those mugs break before they ever get to him, mostly because it makes me laugh to think about the man I broke all those years ago, who still hasn’t put the pieces back together, as shown from all his whining about me, just getting broken coffee mugs in the mail. A perfect symbol.
Gill: We’re uh, uh we’re starting to run out of time here. You’v’e talked a whole lot. We’ve got about ten more minutes. Can you speed down the rest of the card for us?
Caffrey: Loh Elenas gets to fight Tokyo’s sidepiece, Yoyo Banzai, and I’d be amazed if he won. That’s a man with no desire burning in him. That’s a man with no passion, no gears turning inside of his head. Loh is the embodiment of my career when I was in a rut. I watch him talk, but there’s no ranking he ever tops in my head.
Gill: What would you recommend for a struggling wrestler like Loh?
Caffrey: Finding a dayjob.
Wheeler: Wow. You’re really vain, aren’t ya?
Caffrey: 8 years of wrestling allows me to know who’s got it and who doesn’t. I don’t know who the hell The Boulder is but I’ll take Mikael every day of the week. Philippe realized he was bound to lose to Mikael so he left the company before what’s left of his credibility was completely eradicated. It’s a smart call, but he’ll tell you it was fifteen other things. You know, he didn’t include me in his apologies and thank yous when he left. I get a feeling that he didn’t like that I knew he was softer than most ice cream and I was just waiting for him to melt.
Gill: We’ll cover your match at the end. Aelyra vs. Sybyl, Adam Wolfe vs. Tommy Stone for the BFW Carnage Championship, and Amis Shelton vs. Jack Colton for the BFW World Championship are what’s left.
Caffrey: I take Sybyl over Aelyra. Sybyl’s got 100 pounds on Aelyra and was this close to beating Jack Colter. This is her chance to shine though and prove that she deserves to roll with the big boys, so she’s gotta show me and all of them what she’s worth or else we’ll just lump her in with the rest of women’s wrestling in this company. Wolfe, easily.
Wheeler: Easily?
Caffrey: Yeah. And for the main event, I’m taking Shelton over Colter, Jack Colter...if that guy was here and figured out you screwed up his name, Fish, he’d harm you. Jack Colter is a bad man, a womanbeater, a crony, a tool of Adler. If Adler hadn’t banned me from the main event scene for the rest of the year I’d be right up there waiting to bring him back down to Earth. When Amis crushes him too, maybe Jack and I can file a date for a little ‘talk’, and he can see that I’m the star of this company he needs to be worried about.
Gill: And finally, we have your match where you’re teaming up with Tokyo Zombie to take on Sinister Minister and Akragth for the BFW World Tag Team Championships, and apparently there’s a stipulation called Saints and Sinners attached to the gold now.
Caffrey: It basically means that Adler gets to keep one of his cronies protected when Zombie and I rip them apart because only one of us can become champion at a time. And spoiler alert, that’s going to me. I’m not about to let Tokyo Zombie walk out with my championship. You might not remember this but the guy cost me my first shot at the World Championship months and months ago when this company was first getting off the ground. I’m not letting him cost me any more time or gold, and I’m pretty confident I can stomp either Sinister Minister or Akragth. I’d rather team with Akragth so I’ll be hoping to pop Minister but I guess I can settle for being saddled with Minister and American Tommy.
Gill: American --
Wheeler: Well, it looks like we’re just about out of time. Anthony Caffrey, we thank you for coming on our show.
Caffrey: Thank you, it was a pleasure.
Gill: When can people watch your show?
Caffrey: Next week on Sunday on the Frix network, live on pay-per-view. Check your local cable provider.
Wheeler: Thanks again.
Caffrey: Have a good evening, all of you driving home. Always a fan of The Road Home. It was a pleasure.
Wheeler: Goodbye. | |
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